Stains

"He guides me through the paths of righteousness for His Name's sake." - Psalm 23:3

For the past week this verse has been resonating with me. Jesus said that the Kingdom of God is like a treasure. I know I've found that treasure inside of me, but it was dirty and I've been trying to polish and clean it. The reason this verse has been resonating with me is because sometimes I feel I'm really close to having it clean, and then God reveals even more dirt and grime, and all sorts of gunk stuck to it, the results of my selfishness and pride, and the hardest things to clean. The surface stains are easy, it's the deeper stains that are really tough to see and remove. It's painful.

Last Wednesday, God showed me something about myself that I didn't know I had in me. I guess I knew, but I didn't pay it any mind and I never thought it was bad until that night. Another deep stain to remove and even more reason to give thanks to God because, truly, the only good in me is Him. Everything else in me seeks my own comfort and my own reward.

We all have this treasure inside of us. The Lord leads us through paths of righteousness because I think that this treasure is a mirror that needs to reflect His image, His love, and His mercy… if only we can work on getting it spotless.

Today's Prayer:
Oh Lord, You are so good in showing me all the things inside of me that are soiled. I am so grateful that You, in Your mercy, have taken me to mold me into a reflection of Yourself, despite how slow and difficult the process is. I am so very far from perfect, but I can do all things in You who strengthen me. In Jesus' Name we pray, amen.

The Crucifixion

The Fifth Sorrowful Mystery:
The Crucifixion of Our Lord

"There they crucified him and divided his clothes among themselves, casting lots to decide what each should take. People passing by shook their heads and insulted him, saying, "Aha! So you will destroy the Temple and build it up again in three days. Now save yourself and come down from the cross, if you are Son of God." In the same way the chief priests, the elders and the teachers of the law mocked him. They said, "The man who saved others cannot save himself. He trusted in God; let God rescue him if God wants to, since he himself said: I am the son of God." From midday darkness fell over the whole land until mid-afternoon. At about three o'clock, Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi, lamma sabbacthani?" which means: My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? As soon as they heard this, some of the bystanders said, "He is calling for Elijah." And one of them went quickly, took a sponge and soaked it in vinegar and, putting it on a reed, gave him to drink. Others said, "Leave him alone, let us see whether Elijah comes to his rescue." Then Jesus cried out again in a loud voice and gave up his spirit." - Matthew 27:35,39-43,45-50

A friend of mine asked me why I have to make these messages so bloody. And yesterday, when I asked my 17 year old twin brothers to pray the rosary with me and meditate on how Jesus was beaten, they complained and said, "ugh! We don't want to think about that!" But we do have to think about it. We have to imagine each wound, each blister, each drop of blood and each tear Jesus shed because He shed them because of our sins. When the prophet Isaiah foretold of the coming of Jesus, he wrote: He was pierced for our offenses, crushed for our sins… but the Lord laid upon him the guilt of us all (Isaiah 53:5,6). As bloody, horrible, and gruesome as it is, you must know that if our sins weren't that serious, such a violent death would not have been necessary! Because we constantly sin, do horrible things, and turn away from God, all that Jesus went through in His passion, all the blood shed, all the injuries sustained, was 100% necessary. That's how serious our sins are!

Upon the cross, Jesus cried out "my God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" Do you think He said that because He felt God didn't care? No, the reason He said that was because even when He was being crucified, there were people who wouldn't acknowledge or have respect for what He has done for us. Still, while dying on the cross, after all the good that He did, people wanted signs in order to believe. What other signs could you possibly want at this point? Don't be like these people and demand more proof from God in order for you to believe and give your life to Him. The proof is the cross and the blood shed for you is enough reason!

Today's Prayer:
Mary, mother of our Lord, I know you watched in immense pain as they killed your son. I also know you watched Him die, praying that the price He paid would be enough for all to believe in Him. It hasn't been enough, Mary. Pray for us sinners so that we may never take the cross for granted and live our lives following Him.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

O, my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell; lead all souls into Heaven, especially those most in need of Thy mercy. Amen.

The Scourging at the Pillar

The Second Sorrowful Mystery:
Our Lord is Scourged at the Pillar

"Then Pilate set Barabbas free, but had Jesus scourged, and handed Him over to be crucified." - Matthew 27:26

Just a few hours before this, Jesus was before the Jewish elders, questioned before the high priest Caiaphas. They demanded answers from Him, but all they were really looking for were reasons to hand Him over to the romans. They made fun of Him and spit at Him, while Jesus accepted what was happening. Then, He is before Pilate, who didn't really want to crucify Him, but had no choice since the crowds were asking for Jesus' death. So, they took our Lord and tied Him to a pillar. The roman soldiers took turns whipping His back. The whips had pieces of bone attached to the ends that were designed to rip away at pieces of flesh and bone upon contact. There was our Lord, an innocent man, our God, tied to a pillar while His body was mutilated. I can imagine that they missed His back a lot of times and instead, the whips ripped away at the sides of His ribs, probably His face, His arms, His legs. And He accepted all of this because at the end, you and I could ask God for forgiveness with a repented heart, and He will forgive us. No longer would we die, but we will have eternal life.

If He wanted to, Jesus could have resisted, ordered the angels to save Him, or made it so He didn't feel pain, but He didn't. You see, how could we ever serve a God who doesn't know what it is like to suffer the things we suffer? Jesus knew this and wanted to show His love by accepting this fate. We can't ever say God doesn't understand our hurt. Sometimes it can feel like people are killing us when we discover betrayal, deceit, or that someone has said horrible things behind our backs. It can feel like the air was sucked right out of us and pieces of our heart were torn out - well, each time Jesus was spit at, betrayed, with each lashing tearing away at His flesh and muscle, He is right there with you in your suffering… and not because He has to be, but because He wants to be.

Today's Prayer:
Mary, you watched in great sorrow as your son was beaten and put to death for our sins. Please pray for us so that this Holy Week does not pass without our fully realizing how much God loves us and how much we need Him every day of our lives.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

O, my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell; lead all souls to Heaven, especially those in most need of Thy mercy. Amen.

Forgive Others

"If you forgive others their wrongs, your Father in Heaven will also forgive yours. If you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive you either." - Matthew 6:14-15

A good thing to do throughout the day and especially before you go to sleep is to examine your conscience. I like to think about everything I did, everyone I spoke to and think if I offended anyone. A sin is any action that lacks love, so if I said anything mean about someone, if I judged someone, or even if I chose not to help someone when I could have, it's all sin. Thinking about all the bad I do during the day really weighs heavily on my heart. It hurts to think of the times I offend God. I especially feel horrible when I find myself judging someone right off the bad. It's scary and sad to think that's the initial reaction that comes from my heart. But as evil as I am, I really know that God is loving and forgiving. And this is why we all need to really pray for help in forgiving others. I, like many of you, carry around wounds for things people have done to me, things that get me upset just to think about! Some people have hurt us so bad that there's no way we could ever think of even seeing them again, but who are we to hold things against others when we do worse to God and He is always, always forgiving? Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to condone what that person did to you. It only means that you have decided not to hold the grudge and live free of the weight on your shoulders. When you do this, God forgives you for all of your offenses. Then you would be free to have a more open relationship with God and get to know Him better, instead of carrying around pain for the grudges you are harboring. We all want to be better people and this is one of the most important steps in achieving that. We can't be in peace with God unless we're in peace with those around us.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, I think of people who have hurt me and I get angry, but then I am humbled when I think of how You have forgiven me time after time. You call me to be perfect, like our Father is perfect… although that is so hard for me to attain, help me to get one step closer each day. In Your Name we pray, amen.

He Did It Too

"And the Word flesh was made; He had His tent pitched among us." - John 1:14

I have always found it so amazing that God would lower Himself sooo much to actually become a mortal, human being. How could someone eternal, immortal, and omnipotent become one of us? How could our bodies even contain Him? But He did…God chose to cloth Himself with our flesh because that's how much He loves us. He was willing to come down from Heaven and be born of a woman like the rest of us. He grew up, went through adolescence, experienced hurt, joy, pain, embarrassment, excitement, anxiety, worry and anger just like the rest of us. God loves us so much that He wouldn't give us a life that He Himself wouldn't be willing to carry or understand, so He came to experience life with us. There isn't a problem we face that Jesus wasn't willing to experience in the flesh along with us. Loss, poverty, betrayal, those very things that hurt us at our very core, Jesus chose to experience to be united with us and one day free us from the power of sin and death. He pitched His tent among us. He was one of us who bled, was beaten, and died. If our God loves us so much to put Himself through pain, to be united with us, what then could He not ask of us? Or better yet, what aren't we willing to do for our Lord? Pray to Him? Yes. Go to church? Yes? How about have faith in Him even when all things seem opposed? Jesus in human flesh showed us how to have faith, so we can as well. How about love our brother, even when they have wronged us? Jesus in human flesh showed us how to forgive those who beat us down, so we can as well. How about staying faithful in a world that doesn't understand devotion to God and only seeks its own pleasure and interests? Jesus in human flesh showed us how to love God, live upright and persevere in the faith, so we can as well.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, 2000 years ago, You pitched Your tent among us to show us how much You love us. For our sake, You chose to suffer and feel what we feel, and even go through death. When I think that what You ask is too hard for me to accomplish or unrealistic, remind me that You did it as well, so that I can always follow Your life and Your example. In Your Name we pray, amen.

It's Not Him, It's You

"I loved Israel when He was a child: out of Egypt I called my son. But the more I have called, the further from me they have gone." - Hosea 11:1-2

When I was 19 I refused to talk to God. Things with my boyfriend of almost 4 years weren't working out and in my mind it was all God's fault. On the night I realized things weren't going to work out between my boyfriend and I, I locked myself up in the bathroom and with warm tears rushing down my face, I screamed at God: "Why are You doing this to me? You KNEW how much I wanted this and now, because You just don't feel like it, You're taking this away from me after I asked You sooo many times???!!!!"

After this, I didn't lose my faith but I was angry. As someone angry with a friend, I would be "cordial" to God. I would go to church but I wouldn't pray. In my anger and hurt, I would say, "what do I need to pray for? God does whatever He wants anyway!" This is where a lot of people, unfortunately, get stuck. They never see beyond that apparent betrayal from God. I was lucky that I kept my heart open, and with time I came to realize the new peace I had in my life and the new opportunities God had given me after that break-up. I saw the reasons why He did it and I'm glad I never let the hurt from my past relationship keep me from seeing God's good intentions for me. So many people feel God has abandoned them or maybe even, that God might not exist. Just like people in the time of the prophet Hosea turned from God, so do we turn away from God, putting our own walls up that block Him from getting in.

This summer I was called in for what really would have been my dream job. I was contacted by a VP of a record label to be a product manager and I was ecstatic. We went as far as discussing base salary and how they would even pay for my new blackberry. Then, for reasons I wasn't sure of, they decided not to hire me. I really can't tell you how hurt I was, especially because I really hated my job at the moment. I was so close to my dreams and they were snatched right out in front of me. I did cry, but unlike when I was 19, through my tears I decided to praise God because I KNEW He had something better for me. I know other people would probably get angry and ask why would God let me go so far to only lose in the end, but I don't want to be like those other people that doubt His love and His plans for me. And the Lord is so good that because of my trust and faith in Him, He's shown me the reasons behind the things He does…two weeks ago, everyone in the marketing department I would have gone into was laid off, including the VP that interviewed me.

Your relationship with God all depends on your own attitude. The case in most relationships when people say to another, "it's not you, it's me," but they're really lying, does not apply to God. In every case, it really is us! It's us if we aren't open enough to give God time to work and show us the good He's doing behind all these apparently horrible things. God is always looking for us. God always loves us and God is always there. Any absence of God is only falsely perceived.

Today's Prayer:
Lord God, forgive me for being so blind to the good You want to do for me. Forgive me for wanting to hold on to things and getting upset when You try to change things. Teach me to let You have the control. Teach me to trust in You so that I can see the powers of Your hand. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Correction From God

"What you endure is in order to correct you. God treats you like sons and what son is not corrected by his father? Besides, when our parents according to the flesh correct us, we respected them. How much more should we be subject to the Father of the spirits to have life? Our parents corrected us as they saw fit, with a view to this very short life, but God corrects us for our own good, that we may share His holiness. All correction is painful at the moment, rather than pleasant; later it brings the fruit of peace, that is, holiness to those who have been trained by it." - Hebrews 12: 7, 9-11

I have a friend that is going through a very hard, very dark situation. She sees all that's happening in her life as God punishing her for the sins she has committed. I was praying for her one day, and God let me feel that she was lonely and hurt. It wasn't that she was sinful and needed punishment, but that being away from Him had led her astray and she needed Him in order to heal. She sees the bad in her life as God abandoning her and punishing her, but it is actually correction. Slowly, God has been taking away certain things that will cause her harm, and also showing her valuable lessons in humility. This isn't punishment, but correction. God let me feel that He loves her so much, but will let her reach bottom until she has no choice but to acknowledge that He's the only One that can help her. She, like all of us, are God's beloved children. He lets us go out and play in the world, but like a good father, He corrects when we have misbehaved for our greater good. We may think we are smart enough on our own, but when caught up in our errors, we suffer and cry out to the Lord like young children. But as the author of the letter to the Hebrews says, no correction is pleasant at first. My friend is struggling. She feels a pain and a loneliness in her heart that only she and the Lord can understand. However, God knows what He's doing and in time, His actions will bring her what she needs the most - peace.

If you are going through a difficult time and feel God is punishing you, pray and understand that you are going through what's best for your soul. It does not matter to God that you get what you really want right now if what you want makes you lose sight of Him and your salvation. God calls you to be holy and He works so that what He does give you will make you happy here on earth, and most importantly, in Heaven.

Today's Prayer:
Lord, thank You for loving us as Your own children, correcting us so that we don't go down the wrong path. Please have mercy and understanding for those that are lost, for those that are having difficulty seeing and following Your will. Help us all to know in our hearts that You are the way, the truth, and the Life and only You can bring us the peace we need. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Love Hurts

"O, Ephraim, what shall I do with you? O, Judah, how shall I deal with you? This love of yours is like morning mist, like morning dew that quickly disappears. This is why I smote you through the prophets, and have slain you by the words of my mouth. For it is love that I desire, not sacrifice; it is knowledge of God, not burnt offerings." - Hosea 6:4-6

I have a couple of friends that are going through trouble in their relationships. Why is it that when we really love someone, sometimes they just don't correspond to our feelings? There is this one person who fell in love with someone who really seemed to care, but whenever he really needed her, she was gone and not there for him. To retaliate because he was hurt, he would say mean things to her, but only because he wanted her to feel the pain he was feeling. Sometimes she'd come back around when she was lonely, or needed something. He knew this, but he loved her so much, he'd take her back, although he knew her love wasn't sincere.

I've mentioned before that God not only loves us as a Father, but also in the way in which a husband loves his wife. This story I just mentioned is God's love for us as told through the prophet Hosea. God saw His people as His spouse and became so angry when He'd see His people not pay attention to Him and putting things such as wine, money, and sex before Him. He considered them all cheaters. Although He called them all adulterers, He was so hurt that He'd curse them but He wanted them all back. That's why in this passage, the Lord sighs in pain as we do when our relationship isn't going right. "O, Ephraim, what shall I do with you?" Think of the despair you go through when that person you love doesn't call you or answer your calls. They say they love you, but they don't show it. As God says, their love is "like morning dew that quickly disappears." And deep down, even when the one you love does answer you, you want them to be sincere and really love you back, not just because they need something as we do with God.

I picked this passage because sometimes we don't realize how strong God's love for us is and how easily we brush Him aside to focus on other things. The bible is full of verses comparing His love to the love of boyfriend/ girlfriend, husband/ wife. He knows fully well the anguish and despair we feel when we're hurt by love, and by using this comparison through the prophet Hosea, He shows us that His pain is that real.

Today's Prayer:
Lord God, I'm sorry for not loving You or giving You the time You deserve. I could never repay You for Your love but I seek to please You from now on. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Spiritual Illness

"While Jesus was preaching the Word to them, some people brought a paralyzed man to Him. When Jesus saw the faith of these people, He said to the paralytic, 'My Son, your sins are forgiven.'" - Mark 2:2&5

Needless to say, the paralytic got up and started walking, but did you know that without a real relationship with Jesus, you are also sick? One of the major effects of the first sin of Adam and Eve was mortal death; we weren't supposed to die until that fall from grace. The well-being of our souls is intricately attached to the very health of our bodies. In the case of the paralytic, the sin took a physical hold of him, but in many cases, it's a mental hold. Many people live with grudges, anger, depression, hate - all of these are mental and emotional diseases that do have a proven connection to stress which leads to heart problems or major anxiety. Jealousy, envy, pride leads us to argue with a loved one and we refuse to apologize, spending years not talking to that person. Or many times the shame and consequences that come with committing a certain sin causes us to isolate ourselves from others. Is this what you really want your life to be? You need to go to the foot of the cross and realize that it is there that Jesus Christ has defeated sin; leave your own sins there at His feet. You no longer have to carry that dead weight around, release it for the Lord has already paid the price for you. If the weight of a sin, the guilt, the anxiety, the shame, the hurt, the pain, causes you to grieve, stay up at night, remember the paralytic and approach Jesus. He will forgive you of your sins and release the hold it has on your soul and your body. Imagine how liberating it is to no longer hold on to something that has brought you so much grief! Seek healing for your soul and for your body.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, thank You for being the healer of our souls and our bodies. Help us to recognize the sins that are making us ill so that we can make amends and be reconciled to You. In Your Name we pray, Amen.

An Exercise of Your Faith - Jesus Before You

"I saw someone like a son of man, dressed in a long robe tied with a golden girdle. His head and His hair are white as wool or as snow and His eyes are like flames of fire. His feet are like burnished bronze when it has been refined in a furnace. His voice is like the roaring of the waves." - Revelation 1:13-15

During his time in Patmos, the apostle John had a vision of our Lord Jesus Christ after His ascension into Heaven, in which He saw Him absolutely radiant in all of His glory as King. That's a really powerful image of Jesus but I have another which I'd like to share with you; one I'd like you to take a few minutes to pray and meditate on when you can today. It will help you meet Jesus in Your prayers.

When I meditate, I picture myself on a grassy hill on a beautiful spring afternoon. The breeze blows gently on the grass and flowers, and over a hill, I see Jesus walking over to me. He wears a long white robe and His dark brown hair reaches His shoulders. He comes closer and I see the warmth in His face as our eyes meet. He's come to meet me; He came specifically to see me. Without saying a word He sits next to me and looks me in the eyes with so much concern…He knows what I'm feeling…my pain, my joys, my fears, they don't need to be explained because with the way He's looking at me, I know He's able to fully comprehend all I'm feeling…and the emotions surface as the tears well up in my eyes. As a loving mother picks up her 4 year old child to hug, so does Jesus take me into His arms to hold me, and I let myself be embraced by my Lord who has already laid down His life for me. He says to me, "Peace be with you, I give you my peace," as He wipes the tears away. "Not as the world gives peace do I give it to you. Do not be troubled; do not be afraid. As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; remain in my love (John 14:27, 15:9)." And there on the hill, my Lord consoles me and gives me peace, for I know He is forever by my side.

While I know Jesus is strong and powerful, I also know He's my friend. So much more than a God, He's a companion that understands me fully and longs for the moments in which I pour out all I'm feeling to Him. He's there when no one else is. He's been the only one to never fail me and as much as I've betrayed Him, I know He'll always, always be there. Remain in His love.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, I love You. You are my best friend, not just a God. Thank You for walking with me and holding my hand through out my ups and downs. Help me to introduce Your love and friendship to those that need a true friend. In Your Name we pray, Amen.

Bringing You Up From The Pain

"Yahweh said, 'I have seen the humiliation of my people in Egypt and I hear their cry when they are cruelly treated by their taskmasters. I know their suffering. I have come down to free them from the power of the Egyptians and to bring them up from that land to a beautiful spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey.'" -
Exodus 3:7-8

It does not matter if you think nobody cares about you and nobody cares if you're suffering. You are not alone in your pain. Although God was speaking to Moses about the slavery of the Jews in Egypt, right now, He does see your tears and hears your cry. These cries reach the Lord and He knows your suffering - not has heard of your suffering, but actually knows your suffering. And He doesn't want you to feel hurt, despair, alone, He is a loving Father that longs to take you into His arms and help you if you let Him.

While in Egypt, the Jews faced an oppressive Pharaoh that was not going to free them, but God worked wonders sending plagues, turning walking sticks into snakes, the Nile into blood and even parting the sea, so there is no way that He can't help remove a couple of road blocks in the way of your happiness. He told Moses He wanted to, "bring them up from" their troubles. So this tells us that God won't only remove our trouble, but bring us UP FROM them, taking us to a whole new way of life, way of feeling. He took the Jews to the promised land, a land flowing with milk and honey, and He will also bring you to your promised land - the relationship you need, the health you need, the job you need, or the faith you need. You see, when God hears your cry and you sincerely seek His help, He goes above and beyond what you ask, so never, ever take His love, mercy and care for granted, especially in despair and sorrow.

Today's Prayer:
My God, You are so merciful. Thank You for hearing my cries. Help me open my eyes of faith so that I can help You help me through my sorrows and my pain. In Your Name we pray, Amen.

Be The Belt Around God's Waist

""For just as a belt is to be bound around a man's waist so was the people of Israel and Judah bound to me - it is the Lord who speaks - to be my people, my glory and my honor; but they would not listen.'" - Jeremiah 13:11

I have to admit that I feel so sad right now. As you know, I've been keeping all of these emails in a blog (http://tres-lumineux.blogspot.com/) and today I decided to do some research into videos and news about God, Christianity, or even some cool websites to blog about. My search results were pretty sad. Then I went into the social bookmarking site del.icio.us and searched for words like God, Jesus and Christianity and I found that some of the top sites bookmarked were articles talking about how God doesn't exist, or sites making fun of Christianity.

So many people ask what's wrong with the world when the problem is that mostly all have abandoned God. Nobody listens. Religion is now whatever people want it to be. They justify their own desires and then believe in whatever philosophy backs up their own selfishness. Then there are those that see the poverty, violence and hurt in the world and ask "Why would God allow this!". Well, in all honesty, a person who asks this kind of question does NOT know God or they'd know that our Creator is a God of love. Just like the belt Jeremiah had around his waist, God told him He wanted us to be, so close to Him. God is a nurturer, all goodness comes from Him and He wanted to hold us right there with Him. We're the ones that stray and abandon Him, and for what? To go out to parties? To go out and get drunk? To spend a whole day in front of a video game? Or spend hours gossiping about people? Or holding on to hate in our hearts that propagate even more sin? What do you have left after you've done these things? Emptiness. This is what's wrong with the world. So much pain exists because nobody invites God in anymore and the only thing He does not do is interfere with our free will. We do this to ourselves. Think about this - when was the last time you prayed? And when you prayed, what did you pray for? Did you only pray because you needed something? Did you pray in a way to test God to see IF He's really there? Or did you pray because you recognize He is your creator and you need Him in your life? We should always ask Him for things, but more importantly, instead of just asking and asking when we're in a bind, we need to find a way to get back around His waist.

Today's Prayer:
My Lord, forgive me and forgive others for our lack of love and attention for You. I am so sorry for having strayed but please have mercy on us and help us to win back Your favor and be Your people. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

No More

"God will be with them and wipe every tear from their eyes. There shall be no more death or mourning, crying out or pain, for the world that was has passed away." - Revelation 21:3-4

I woke up so tired today. It just feels like every day is the same thing and I'm not where I want to be. There are things that hurt me and trouble I see coming down the road. Life just gets too heavy sometimes and I wish I didn't have to deal. On the train, I listened to my iPod and this song "No More" came on and immediately grabbed me. I've listened to it so many times but today God wanted me to remember and understand the words in this song. Read these words and think about these words that gave me so much happiness, strength and comfort today.

"No More"
Lately I've been waking up with questions in the night/
Lately I've been waiting through a mass of how's and why's/
Lately I've been trying hard to walk by faith and not by sight...

Still I need to keep reminding me that for all eternity/
I am leaving this pain, far behind/
I am leaving these how's and these why's...

And there will be -
No more questions, no more sorrow,
You'll wipe away every tear I've ever cried/
And No more worries about tomorrow,
no more wondering what Your face looks like...

Lately I've been tired of this struggle to survive/
Lately its been raining awfully hard down deep inside/
Lately I've been straining just to see You through these, clouded eyes...

Still I need to keep reminding me that for all eternity/
I am leaving this rain, far behind/
I am leaving these clouds far behind...

And there will be -
No more questions, no more sorrow,
You'll wipe away every tear I've ever cried/
And No more worries about tomorrow,
And no more wondering what Your face looks like...

God let me feel today that my life is short. If I let go of my worrying, which gets me no where, He will take care of me while I am alive. We're here to struggle maybe only 75, 90 years max - after that, after all the pain and struggling, we'll be with God forever in eternity. It's not that I'm looking forward to dying, it's that all this we go through is temporary and what's coming up next is so much more important and so much better than anything we have here. So, don't worry. Only preoccupy yourselves with reaching the salvation of your souls which is closer than you think.

Today's Prayer:
Jesus, look at my pain and my sorrows and help me to make it through to where You are. I know my life is so short and You are more than worth the struggle and the wait. Grant me the desire of my soul to be with You in Heaven. In Your Name we pray, Amen.