Who's In Control?

"On that day you will no longer be ashamed of all your deeds when you were unfaithful to me; I will have removed from your midst the boastful and arrogant and you will not feel proud anymore on my holy mountain." - Zephaniah 3:11

In my relationship with God I am always in one of three places. The first place makes me feel the worst… it is when I feel ashamed… when I have offended God by either doing something very bad or something small like not caring to pray when I had the time and chose not to. I feel like He's disappointed in me and I dare not even approach Him. The second place is much worse although I never stop to realize that I should feel bad… this is when I feel I have control of everything in my life and depend on myself rather than on God. I focus on what I have to do and what I need to do in order to get by. I put way too much trust in my abilities and what I think I can accomplish. I run 100mph and hardly stop to think about what God thinks and how God is fitting (or not fitting) into my life at that moment.

The third place is where I should be all the time. It is where I feel the most joy and the most peace… it is when I give up control of my life and put everything in God's hands. If He created me, He has a plan. I literally have to say to myself, "Audrey, God is bigger than you… TRUST IN HIM," and I make myself forget about my worries and whatever I'm stressing, and I promise you right now that my God and your God has NEVER EVER disappointed me… and He never will. And this holds true for the good times and the bad; I have trusted Him during both.

As hard as it seems to accomplish, you have to let go. If you believe in the Lord, you need to give Him back the power to pick you up when you feel the weakest so that He can fill what you're missing, and level you down when you're running on a false confidence, when you need to know that He alone is the Almighty, not you. It is all about control and realizing that your life is in His hands, not your own. As Jesus said, we don't even have the ability to make one hair on our heads grow white, so then what power do we actually have? The only control we have is the biggest gift we could ever give to the Lord - to give up our will to God so He can take care of us in a much, much better way than we ever could.

Today's Prayer:
Almighty Father, You are good. You are nurturing when I fall into temptation and feel I don't deserve Your love and You are patient when I become proud and neglect You. I give up my will to You so that from now on You can lead me, protect me, and bless me. In Jesus' Name we pray, amen.