No Such Thing As Soul Mates

"In the beginning of creation God made them male and female, and because of this, man has to leave father and mother and be joined to this wife, and the two shall become one body. So they are no longer two but one body. Therefore let no one separate what God has joined." - Mark 10:6-9

I really hate it when people use the term "soul mate." To me, it means that two people match each other perfectly, never argue, and are always considerate and caring with each other. Unfortunately, this doesn't exist. Real love is about unconditional love that accepts the ugly as openly as it accepts the good. Soul mates don't exist because human beings have to put real effort into relationships, giving of ourselves completely in order to forget about self and attend to the needs of another. Many marriages fail because people become consumed with being happy and being understood by their partner, when Christ taught us that happiness comes from serving and understanding the other. Jesus is the perfect example of this type of love. He never asked if we loved Him in return, He never asked us to pay Him more attention, He never asked us to change anything or to do more for Him, instead, He gave up everything to the point of death, putting Himself last and the needs of His beloved first. Jesus showed His love with blood, sweat, and tears, not with I love you's and butterflies in His stomach. He was killed and He still loves us, He was betrayed and He still loves us. He gives and gives and gives and recieves very little back, but He still loves us and isn't going anywhere.

My parents have been married for 28 years. What I've learned from them is that a real relationship is a lot of work; it doesn't come easy at all. They didn't teach me this with words, but I've seen them as they sacrifice themselves for the other, going that extra mile after a long day, and forgiving and accepting the other through disagreements. Sometimes things don't get resolved, but they remain dedicated to the other. I believe that in order to do this, we must have Jesus in our lives to learn from Him about choosing forgiveness and mercy over what's in it for ourselves, and in this way, we can move from a selfish love to an unconditional, life-long love.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, You showed us what it really means to love, to deny what we want in order to serve the one we love. Give me strength in order to see that the purest happiness is to see the one we love happy. Allow me to follow Your example always. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Human Sexuality

"God said, 'Let there be light;' and there was light. God said, 'Let us make man in our image, to our likeness.'" - Genesis 1:3,26

When God spoke the words "let there be light," He spoke into them all of His power. This wasn't just a bright light, but a fire of energy that burst forth to set all creation into motion. The same fire, power, and energy was put into us when we were created in God's image. The Lord, who put all of His passion into creation, also put that fire and passion into us. We are made in God's image in the sense that we have an incredible ability to love and love passionately. The central place this love is revealed is through our sexuality. It is the source of creation. From this fire we were created and we too create new life from it.

A lot of times many people are ashamed of their sexuality or feel a need to hide it, thinking that some how God does not approve of sexual feelings or desires, when it was God that put that passion into each and every one of us. It's the drive we have within us to go out to love and be loved. In being like God, we have the need for intimacy, for affection, for touch, for real love. This is a good thing and a gift from God. But it's a gift that needs to be taken care of. I'm learning in ministry classes that from the time a baby is born, it is already a sexual being and that from birth we all go through a cycle of psycho-sexual maturation with various stages all the years of our lives. Sometimes along that journey, traumas can occur that affect our sexual development. We become hurt because of rejection, abuse, guilt, shame or a number of things that lock us in a stage of development for a while and we never grow to reach the full, sexual life God intended for us. Many times people abuse sexuality and take freedom to mean purely genital pleasure, not the fullness and depth God intended through love. When we learn that sexuality is a gift to be valued, and as mature persons share that love and intimacy with a partner who is our equal, God is in that union. It is holy and pleasing to the Lord.

Today's Prayer:
Lord God, thank You for the gift of sexuality. Through it, You teach us how to love and give ourselves in love to another as You have done for us. Help guide us Lord so that we don't abuse the gift, but use it as You please so that we can have life in abundance. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Couples - What It Means to Love

"And as the Church submits to Christ, so let a wife submit in everything to her husband. As for you, husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her." - Ephesians 5:24-25

We all know God is our Father, but also throughout history there have been many comparisons to God's relationship with us to that of a husband and wife. The relationship between a couple is one of a sublime, deeper love, one characterized by a yearning to be with that other person. The Old Testament book Song of Songs reads as a poem between lovers but it is actually about the soul's longing to be connected to God. And now in the New Testament, we have a comparison between Christ's love for us and marriage between a man and a woman.

The main theme in this bible verse from Paul's letter to the Ephesians is to love your partner in the same way Jesus has loved us. And how has Jesus proven His love for us? Besides obviously dying on the cross and sacrificing Himself for our well-being, He lived a life of service, washing His disciples' feet instead of the other way around. He listened to the crowds and fed them. He healed them when they were sick and He spent time with them. But if you think about the main reason Jesus did all of this, you realize what our main role should be as husbands and wives/ boyfriends and girlfriends - to bring our partner to God. Every single thing Jesus did in His ministry was to give those He loved eternal life and joy in God. If you really love the person you're with, the ultimate way of proving your love and intentions for that person is to make sure they're right with God. You love this person so much that not only do you take care of their physical and emotional needs, but their spiritual needs as well. And as their soul grows closer to God, so will your relationship, as everything which has God as its foundation can weather any storm and overcome any obstacle.

Today's Prayer:
Lord, You created man and woman to be with one another and love each other as You have loved us. Help me to bring the gift of Your love to my partner and open their heart to receive You fully. Help us to grow together in You. In Your Name we pray, amen.