Not Grown Up Yet

"When I was a child I thought and reasoned like a child, but when I grew up, I gave up childish ways. Likewise, at present we see dimly as in a faulty mirror, but then we shall see face to face." - 1st Corinthians 13:11-12

I find myself telling my little brothers phrases like, "when I was your age…" or "you'll understand when you get older," things my parents used to tell me and I never believed them until now. When we're younger, we think we know it all, until we get older and realize how foolish we were. It's the same thing with God. Sometimes I sit in my room and whine to myself about praying (do I haaaave to??) or get upset when I don't understand something God does. Just as I was childish and impatient when I was a little girl, I am childish now in my spiritual life. We are all childish in this sense because none of us have reached a spiritual maturity which surrenders to and obeys God's will perfectly. In the meantime, we are like whiny little children who unreasonably complain about things that don't seem fair to us, who get mad when we don't get the toy we want and get jealous when someone else has it.

We outgrew our human childhood (most of us, I hope), let's work on developing our spiritual maturity so we can reason like adults and accept God's perfect will in our lives. One day, as Paul says here in his letters to the Corinthians, we will be face to face with God Himself and all will be made known to us. We will understand everything instantly and then we will be able to look back at our lives and how little we know now.

Today's Prayer:
Father, I ask that You take me by the hand and lead me. I know I whine and complain, but please have mercy on me. Show me how to speak and walk. Guide me in all of my steps until that day when I grow up and am able to understand it all. Most importantly, give me patience to take all the baby steps I need to make. In Jesus' Name we pray, amen.

Beaten Down But Still Positive!

"So they set the crowd against them and the officials tore the clothes off Paul and Silas and ordered them to be flogged. And after inflicting many blows on them, they threw them into prison, charging the jailer to guard them safely. About midnight, Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening." - Acts of the Apostles 16:22-25

That last part of the passage doesn't quite fit with the rest, does it? How could Paul and Silas have been beaten and jailed for preaching about Jesus and yet have the joy to sing to God while in handcuffs? If it were me, I would be mad and asking God how could this be where He's led me after what I did for Him! Right after this, God made it so that both Paul and Silas escaped jail and converted one of the prison guards. But most of us never get to see the good God brings out of negative situations because we're so stuck on being mad and not seeing past the now. Paul and Silas didn't have this problem… yes, they were beaten, life is tough… they were put in jail, but at the end of the day, their faith told them that God would help them and bring something good out of their problem Therefore, why get mad? Why get pessimistic? If you really have faith in God, then through your problems, you should be singing praise to God.

God saw Paul and Silas' complete trust in Him and because of that, rescued them and allowed them to bring the faith to someone new. Why don't you apply this to your life today? Instead of being upset, have an attitude of hope and wait for His deliverance.

Today's Prayer:
Jesus, sometimes things in my life beat me up. I have arguments with people and things don't always turn out in my favor. But despite all of these things, I give You thanks because no matter how bad things seem, You have me in the palm of Your hand, with my best intentions at heart. In Your Name we pray, amen.

The Conversion of Saint Paul

"As he traveled along and was approaching Damascus, a light from the sky suddenly flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, 'Saul, Saul! Why do you persecute me?' And he asked, 'Who are you, Lord?' The voice replied, 'I am Jesus whom you are persecuting.'" - Acts 9:3-5

The interesting thing about Paul before his encounter with Jesus is that he was acting out of zeal for his Jewish faith. Paul thought he was doing the right thing and doing it for God's kingdom. In the same way, I'm sure each of us has our righteous inclinations about certain things and if we don't examine ourselves carefully under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, those attitudes we hold on to might be pulling us into sin without us realizing it. There really are many aspects to a Spiritual life that can be damaging instead of constructive. For example, someone may become prideful of having a close relationship with God and look down upon other sinners. But our Lord is a merciful God and I believe that when our heart is in trying to do God's will, He'll open our eyes to our mistakes. In the case of Paul, his passion for his law and religion blinded him from seeing the harm he was causing. Because so many new Christians suffered at his hands, it was Jesus that was being persecuted along with them, just like we persecute Jesus when we believe ourselves to be righteous and act upon our misguided beliefs. However, what the enemy intends for our harm, God uses for our good, and in order to stop Paul dead in his tracks from arresting more Christians, Jesus Himself appeared before him with such intensity that Paul was knocked from his horse and onto the ground. As you know, Paul went on to bring the news of Jesus to all the pagan nations outside of Jerusalem, demonstrating that God can take the worst parts of us, like Paul with his zeal for arresting Christians, and use that for the glory of His Kingdom. But before that happens, expect the bumps in the road that will knock us down. Expect obstacles allowed by God that will leave us completely disoriented. All these things are necesary for a true conversion and to be a true instrument of God's power.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, knock me down if there are things I am blind to that are leading me to sin. Strip away all pride and ego and leave me with a humble heart that only seeks to work for Your kingdom. In Jesus' Name we pray, amen.

Christ In Me

"In face of the strong wind, he was afraid and began to sink. So he cried out, "Lord, save me!" - Matthew 14:30

In Galatians 2:19, Saint Paul writes, "it is no longer I who live, but Christ in me." I can't explain to you how I wish I could see myself beaten down and put against every type of adversity, like Paul, and still be able to stay in the peace of the Lord, saying that I have died to my fears, my worries, my insecurities, and my life is lived for and by Christ. Instead, at times I find myself more broken than before, lonelier that before. At times I feel so much like Peter. I want to walk on water towards Jesus, but what I end up doing is perceiving Him to be further away than He is. I only see the huge waves and the rough winds pushing me down, wearing me down. And it hurts that my faith is not as strong as I'd want it to be, or thought it was. Like a lost child, I find myself crying out to God, just like Peter did for the Lord to help my poor little faith. Yet, although I have such a long way to go, I have to remember that I'm on a journey with a beginning, an end, and sooo many bumps and rough patches on the way…it doesn't mean I'll never get there though. On the water, I'm feeling so lost, so helpless and I can't see God because I'm too focused on my fear and the waves around me. I long to be like Paul, beaten, persecuted, hated, and yet so full of joy, full of peace, not alone but in the company of Jesus Christ. No matter what came at him, Paul rejoiced and God made His presence known in Him. But my own faith is weak and I pray that Jesus hears my cry for help and brings me to walk on the water with Him to a place where the storm within me is quiet and I can also say that it is not I who live, but Christ in me.

Today's Prayer:
Lord God, please don't take into account my lack of faith, but the pain it causes me to know that I am not as strong as I thought and that I have let You down. Jesus, just as You raised up Peter, raise me up. Transform me on my journey to walk through the valley of the shadow of death and have You live in me. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Love

"Love is patient, kind, without envy. It is not boastful or arrogant. It is not ill-mannered nor does it seek its own interest. Love overcomes anger and forgets offenses. It does not take delight in wrong, but rejoices in truth. Love excuses everything, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." - 1st Corinthians 13:4-6

I think that this is one of the most beautiful passages in the bible. I know a lot of couples use this for their readings on their wedding day at mass, but the theme that Paul touches upon here is much broader than just romantic love. All values, beliefs, commandments, everything is based on love and the kindness we show to others. And the most important part of this love is that it be sincere, not showing love because we feel it's appropriate at certain situations, but to really, genuinely express love to others in the form of service. Love isn't love when we wait for others to do something for us first. Love isn't love when we keep a checklist of what others have done to us. No, love forgives, love first seeks the others' comfort before we seek our own. Love never ever rejoices at the downfall of another. Love expects the best out of people and love can withstand anything, even the biggest offenses. True love that comes from God can do this.

Not possible you're thinking? Guess again. I've heard of people that have forgiven the murderer of their own child. People that have put their own lives at risk to help strangers, like the man that jumped in front of a subway train to help someone who had fallen on the tracks. And then we have Jesus Christ, who gave up His own life for us while His enemies laughed at Him, eventhough He was able to save Himself. None of this happens over night, but if you don't at least take baby steps every day to try to achieve more love each day, more service to a stranger, more patience to someone who gets on your nerves, you will have no love inside of you. No love is really having no life because all that is inside you is dead. No one could ever love you in the right way because you could never show them true love. But to achieve this we have our Lord to help us, who gives us much more than we could ever ask for or imagine, if we do truly seek to love as He loves.

Today's Prayer:
Lord God, show me to love as You love. Right now, I can only really love those who love me and even then I don't serve them as I should. Open my heart, strengthen it so I can have the courage to forget all offenses in Your Name. Show me how to love perfectly and serve all of Your children, from the least to the greatest. In Your Name we pray, amen.

The New Self

"You must give up your former way of living, the old self, whose deceitful desires bring self-destruction. Renew yourselves spiritually, from inside, and put on the new self, or self according to God, which is created in true righteousness and holiness." - Ephesians 4:22-24

I bet you're waiting for a miracle in your life. You're waiting for God to speak to you in an amazing way or an angel to appear to you, touch you and instantly you're a saint, and you go around doing good to all you meet. You expect to be touched and instantly be converted, love going to church each week and reading the bible. That happens to about 1% of people, the rest have to keep trying to put on the new self.

I'm reading a really great book right now called An Invitation to a Journey, a roadmap for spiritual formation. It talks about how being spiritual is a hot thing right now. Madonna is rocking her red string bracelet and Tom Cruise is an ambassador for Scientology. We think we can get spirituality quickly and if nothing happens when we pray, God isn't in that religion so we try another. That isn't the way to true spirituality. True spirituality is a process which usually takes our whole lives to fulfill. It is the process of becoming more like God and if we really take a good look at ourselves, that is going to take a lot of time! Whether you see it right now or not, we are all on this journey. Every day we make decisions that either make us more self-centered, lonely people, spreading the shallowness of this world, or every day we take a step closer in trying to brighten someone's day or lending a hand to a friend or stranger in need. This is what Paul means by doing away with the old self - the part of us that tends towards self-destruction. Instead, we need to strive to put on the new self, using each and every day as a vehicle of light and not darkness. And if you think it's not that serious, think again… each day you live reaffirms either the good or bad in your life.

Your decision to use your journey is one that you need to make every day. There really are only two paths in life and your intentions in your decision making make all the difference as to which path you're walking. Each day is a brand new day in the journey of your spirituality, and if you choose to be light instead of darkness, every day you will be a little more like God. Remember, not even God created the world in a day, so don't expect a conversion overnight.


Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, help me to each day leave my old self behind and be more like You. Remind me that my life is a journey and that one step back doesn't necessarily mean I am lost or a bad person. Help me learn from my mistakes to build my new self and actively choose to be light of the world each day. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Don't Be a Victim

"In all of this we are more than conquerors, thanks to Him who has loved us." - Romans 8:37

I see a lot of people who drown in a glass of water and up until a few months ago, I was just like them. Yes, I do get stressed and panicky from time to time, but if the love of God has taught me anything, it's that He takes care of me no matter what. All I do, even the smallest things, even on a day I forget to say my morning prayers, He watches over and defends me on.

This realization gave my faith a major boost. When something happens or I get apprehensive about something in the future, I worry for a second but then my next thought is "Lord, I know it will be ok because You are taking care of me!" and then all is well in my mind. So realize, that you are more than a conqueror in everything! Right before this verse Paul talks about trials, anguish, hunger, lack of clothing, danger, persecution - a lot of horrible things, yet, in all and through all these things, we are more than conquerors. In God, we not only make it through, but we come out better than before!!! So pick up your droopy head! Put a smile on your face and bring back the joy to your heart! God has called you! God loves you and wants you to know that He has made you more than a conqueror in that problem you're facing! Believe this and get your hope back! A favorite preacher of mine, Joel Osteen, loves to say "In God, you are not a victim, you are a victor!" And until you begin to feel that God made you more than a conqueror, you will always make yourself a victim.

Today's Prayer:
Lord Jesus, I believe with all my heart that You make me more than a conqueror. Although a problem is big to me, it is nothing to You. It's just another way for You to show Your greatness. Help me to show those that are sad around me Your love so that they can walk in victory. In Your Name we pray, amen.

Miracles Take Unity

"They were faithful to the teaching of the apostles, the common life of sharing, the breaking of the bread and the prayers. A holy fear came upon all the people, for many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles." - Acts 2:42-43

Throughout the bible we read amazing stories and amazing miracles performed by the prophets. Today, many wonder why these things are not seen anymore. It says in Acts that when Paul and Peter walked by the sick, even their shadows falling upon people made them well. It's hard to believe because we seldom see these huge manifestations from God happen before our eyes. It wasn't that God cared about them more and abandoned us, it's that we don't live in the same way the apostles and the early believers did. We feel independent from everyone, even our own families. Nobody thinks they need anyone. Reread this verse and see that miracles and signs were abundant because the believers lived in community, they shared with one another, they prayed together constantly and they remained faithful and obedient to the Word of God. They encouraged one another letting the Holy Spirit thrive and work through them. That's hard to do on an individual level, how much more on a bigger level? If you want to see these miracles happen in your own life, you need to become one with God. If you want to see these miracles happen in your own community, you need to become one with God and your peers supporting unity, supporting the will of God.

Today's Prayer:
Lord God, we moved away from the values of Your early church. Bring us together as a family so that we can be united in serving You and carrying out our faith. Let the Holy Spirit works through us so that all can see Your wonders. In Your Name we pray, amen.

We Are Strongest When We Are Weak

"'My grace is enough for you; my great strength is revealed in weakness.'" - 2nd Corinthians 12:9

Paul was a man of God, a champion of faith, but he suffered from a weakness, something he called a thorn in his flesh, which he asked God to remove until God answered him with this verse.

When we think about our own heroes and the people we look up to, for most of us, it's the rich and powerful, or the attractive people with the right clothing and accesories, but God chooses those we often overlook. Many times, those with power only depend on themselves and what they can make happen on their own, not trusting in God. They have too much stuff in the way so that God can never make His way through the clutter. On the other hand, the poor and those we don't find interesting or attractive, don't hold on to the things of this world and know how to empty themselves before God. It is in these people, those who recognize that before the Almighty they are nothing, that God reveals Himself. Out of their weakness, He is able to manifest Himself in all of His glory for others to see and believe. Here we see that God does what He wants with whom He wants because His strength does not depend on our own power. Therefore, never brush aside those that with the eyes of the flesh you see as nothing for those who on the outside look better, for your human mind will never even be able to fathom the miracles God creates out of what you deem insignificant. And in the same way, when you are weak and have no strength left, don't scorn God or try to rely on your own strength, but pray and wait to experience God's power in you.

Today's Prayer:
Lord, I am nothing before You. Help to wash away my pride and my false sense of strength so that You can truly work in me for the glory of Your Kingdom In Your Name we pray, Amen.

Eyes on The Prize

"I do not believe I have already reached the goal, nor do I consider myself perfect, but I press on till I possess Christ Jesus, since I have been pursued by Him. No, brothers and sisters, I do not claim to have claimed the prize yet. I say only this: forgetting what is behind me, I race forward and run towards the goal, my eyes on the prize to which God has called us from above in Christ Jesus." - Phillipians 3:12-14

In his letter to the Phillipians, Paul speaks about his goal - being like Christ and sharing in His resurrection. He says he was pursued by Christ and he definitely was. Jesus knocked him off a horse to get his attention! We all know what a champion Paul is to the Christian faith, helping to convert multitudes of people and even today through these letters he left behind.Regardless, Paul was just like you and I are today, trying everyday to get one step closer to God despite of our weak spirits.

Now, I know many of you might think, "But I'm not anything like Paul, he had so much faith and was such a good person," but before Paul became a Christian, he was out there killing people who believed in Jesus. You might think to yourselves, "I don't deserve to follow God," or "I can't go to church because I'm a sinner," but have any of you murdered anyone? Paul did and look at the man Jesus Christ made out of him! How can Jesus not work in you and make a greater person out of you?

Our lives should be a race, every day pressing on until we are one step closer. No one is asking that you become perfect over night but what you do today counts for where you will be tomorrow. Maybe you're expecting a sign from God, just as Jesus appeared to Paul during his conversion, but this email to you today is your call from God now to begin on your race - there are so many people in this world and today, on Pentecost Sunday, Jesus has chosen you to receive this message because He wants you to follow Him. Forget about your past and move forward in Christ - leave the rest to the Lord for if you do this, you WILL see His wonders.

Today's Prayer:
Jesus, I come before You today because You know that I want to be more like You. Help me to put my past aside and strive for this goal day by day. Give me Your Holy Sprit so that I may always be strengthened along the way. In Your Name we pray, Amen.